Moms' Night Out

"Dude, I still don't get this plan."

"Don't call me dude in public. And what's not to get? We turn ourselves into copies of our moms, buy some booze to pregame, then go out partying. Everyone's parents think we're sleeping over at Ryan's house, but his parents are out of town and he's paying his little brother to cover if anyone calls."

Trying to Change Her Mind

It didn't have to be this way. Don't get me wrong, I'm enjoying myself, but it didn't have to come to this.

Not the Spring Break He Had in Mind

Aaron had been trying to hook up with Sarah all semester, but she always seemed to think of him as just a friend. When she asked if he wanted to take the place of her roommate who had backed out of their spring break girls' trip, Aaron jumped at the chance.

It's day two of the trip, and Erin is farther than ever from hooking up with Sarah.

Happy Erection Day

Good morning, gentle readers! I just wanted to wish my American audience a happy Erection Da--

What's that? Oh, excuse me, I'm getting word now that it is actually Election Day. With that in mind, be sure to vote! If even your perverted wank material writer is telling you to do it, it must be important!

Investigative Reporting

"We're live in 5... 4... 3..." The producer signaled 2, 1, and Steve launched into the segment.

Is There Really a Wrong Way?

"Dale, I realize I've only been a woman for 20 minutes, so I might not be an expert, but I'm pretty sure this isn't how titty fucking usually works."

Halloween Costume Party Extravaganza!

Hey readers! I've come up with another interactive post as your special Halloween treat. Just click your way through to see all the options; no need to refresh the page. Enjoy!

"Hello, dearie. It's Halloween - the night every year when my powers reach their peak. With that in mind, I've decided to have a little fun with you. Why you? No need to overthink it."