Not Very Convincing

"Yo, Tyler."

"Yeah man, what's up?"

"Can you tell me one more time exactly how this all happened?"

"Dude, I told you, I was minding my own business, and this crazy witch comes out of nowhere. She points her magic wand or whatever at me, and then, bam! I've got this dumb girly body."

"Uh huh... And you definitely didn't do this to yourself with some spell you found on the internet?"

"Ha, no way dude! You think I would give myself these sweet tits and ass intentionally? That would be crazy!"

"For sure. And you're definitely not enjoying yourself, right?"

"Oh hell no! Being in this body, wearing these tight little outfits that show off my curves, it totally sucks."

"And when Chad came over the other night, that was just to study?"

"Exactly! I can't get another extension on my statistics exam, and Chad is acing the class and also I heard he had a huge cock. I don't get why you're being so weird about this!"

Play Ball(s)

"Yeah, the merchandise alone is gonna-- hang on, my star client just walked in, and he looks as excited as we are about the news!"

Bryce looked anything but excited. "Springfield, Kenny? Fucking Springfield??"

POW!! BAM!! OHHHH!!

"So you can actually grant whatever I wish for?"

"Jeez, yes kid, I'm a fairy, you saved me from getting eaten by your deranged cat, so I owe you one wish," the tiny man groaned as he rubbed his temples. "And again, can you please keep it down? That's the last time I party with leprechauns, one more beer my ass."

FEMIBOTT ALPHA -- NOT FOR PUBLIC RELEASE

Not In Denial

Hey, not feeling good again tonight.

I lay in bed, waiting for my girlfriend's response.

Oh, that sucks! I was looking forward to seeing you. Feel better :(

Not MY Husband

Relief washed over me as I saw my wife enter the room. "Liz, baby! It's me, Henry! Some crazy bimbo broke in, and she-- she switched bodies with me. I know it sounds nuts, but you've gotta believe me!"

How Did This Happen?

Brooke had told me time after time about her loser boyfriend, how he could never keep a decent job or contribute around their apartment. I tried to be a supportive friend, but one day I finally blurted out, "I can't listen to this again. All you ever do is complain about this guy! I'm trying to think of one good reason out of everything you've told me why you shouldn't just break up with him!"

Brotherly Love

"Oh yeah, you like that, big boy?"

"Ugh," Brendan grumbled. "Elaine would never say that."

"Yeah, and she would never be grinding on top of you with her tits in your face, so just shut up and let me get this over with."

No Such Thing As Too Much Fun

"Hey Dylan? I wanna be super serious with you, alright?"

"Yeah man, like... no prolem. Wass up?"

"OK, this is exactly what I want to talk about. You know that body can't handle liquor like your regular one, right?"

"Yeah, totally."

"Aaand, when we get too drunk, we make bad decisions, right?"

"Are you stil mad about that guy from las night? I'll be quieter next time, god."

"No, I'm not--"

"You could get laid too you know, for real. You're kinda short but you have great tits. Look at 'em! If I felt any attraction for girls right now, I would eat you out soo hard. God I love that this is a nude beach."

"*Sigh*... OK, look. I get that you're having fun. But remember: every time you-- hey, look at me! Every time you have sex, it adds another week before you'll change back."

"Don't be jealous, you can toally catch up."

"Look, I'm not jealous, I'm just--"

"Aright, shut up for a second... So if it's eight. No, wait, if it's nine, but the first one was a blow jay and the last one was in my butt. How long do I still have boobs?"

"Dylan, you absolute slu--"

"Oh shit, they're doing shots at the tiki bar!"

What Are Friends For?

"OK, look, I'll show them to you one time. Happy?"

"That was like half a second! I don't get why you're making such a big deal out of it."

"Because I just turned into a girl three days ago! Maybe I'm not comfortable showing you my freaking tits any time you ask."

"Dude, we fucked last night."

"First of all, rude. Secondly, that was a one-time thing and a mistake and never should have happened!"

"Alright, jeez. You wanna go grab something to eat?"

"Yeah, sure. Hey..."

"What?"

"What if we made it, like, a two-time thing?"