Rough Breakup

"And anotherr thing... being a chick? Not that fuckin' bad. I didn't have to-- I didn't buy one goddamn drink all day!"

"..."

"Oh you go right to hell, bi--bruurp--bitch. I don't care if I am stuck in this body. I can STILL find a better girlfriend than you! Fuck it, maybe I'll find a boyfriend! Maybe I'll find one of your exes and suck his dick, since I know you probably never did."

"..."

"Don't bother coming, I'm not at the beach anymore. Stupid cops said 'indecent exposure is against the law' and I had to 'put my bikini back on.' You know the real crime? Keeping these sexy titties locked up!"

"..."

"I'm fine, geez! This dude Larry is giving me a ride. No, wait, Terry. Yeah. Anyways, Terry said I look fuckin' hot, which I do, because he can give someone a fuckin' compliment, so we're going to Netflix and chill at his place."

"..."

"I know what it means, I'm not an idiot! You don't think I've played with myself since you did this to me? You don't think I've wondered about having a real dick all up in this pussy? God, my nips are getting tingly just thinking about it. I'm already drunk, because girl-me can't handle her liquor for shit, so I figured what the hell?"

"..."

"Of course I thought about that! Terry's in the store buying condoms right now! Bye bitch, thanks for the tits!"